Friday, February 21, 2014

Blogging About Teens Is A Combustible Thing

Teens are like fireworks - ready to explode!

Recently, a friend on Facebook was lamenting about how difficult the teenage years are for parents and how, in stark contrast to the number of women blogging about their kids' younger years, there aren't that many of us blogging about the teens. I often mention Junior, who is 13, but I understand why there aren't more of us writing covering this time of life; there are multiple reasons, including, but not limited to:

  • We're busy because kids at this age are busy. I'm driving Junior to friends' houses, activities, etc.

  • In addition to our teen, we often have other kids, and keeping the family in check is hard. Schedules are, once again, hectic and trying to keep track of who is where is a challenge.

  • The potential to wound your kids psychologically is enormous, never more so than when they're teens. This embarrassment factor, which can be fun and powerful, can also be damaging to parent-teen relationships. As parents, we realize that our time with these changlings is extremely limited and I, for one, don't want to mess that up by ticking Junior off too badly.

  • They're volatile and bat-shit crazy at this age. Their hormones are racing around, their bodies are topsy-turvy, their relationships are confusing and there's a lot of pressure at school.  Basically, they're tornadoes with legs. Who wants to unnecessarily be on the wrong end of that?

  • What goes on the Web, even if it's taken down, stays on the Web. I, for one, don't want to say the wrong thing which can somehow become a permanent part of Junior's digital footprint.

  • Kids change less quickly during the teenage years than when they were toddlers. The changes are ultimately larger, but they can also be more subtle and less observable when you're with the kids on a daily basis. 

  • Parents of these kids may be in denial. I don't want to think about Junior growing up and moving away and if I don't write about it, then I don't have to face it...until it becomes absolutely necessary.  

  • Many people re-enter the workforce (as I'm trying to do) when their kids become teens and just don't have the time.
So I, for one, choose to write about my teen in limited doses, focusing more on how the changes in him affect me, how they're a part of my parenting journey. These are bittersweet years, unlike the predominately joyful first few; they are to be savored and sometimes, just endured.

No, there aren't as many moms writing about teens, so listen to those of us who do (and remember that in addition to the blog you're reading right now, I write another one: Even if your kid is little, your time is coming.  Learn from those us in the midst right now.  And bring cookies. 


Lana L. said...

I'm happy to find another mom blogging about the teen years. I'll be back to read more of your blog...

The Momma said...

Thanks! Yep, the teen years are trying for all involved. SO happy I'm not there!