My 1/14 (or was it 19) posting was really the summary of notes I took at a parenting seminar on Siblings. In response to that, our family decided to draft our Family Rules.
Since some of my friends have asked that I share these rules, I am with the following caveats: 1) Said rules do not completely eliminate arguments, but they have reduced them a great deal. 2) The rules are not enforced for the 3-year old. We'll talk to her about them, but she's still too young to be held accountable for some of them. The older child knows this & is comfortable in knowing that, although Little Sis is excused, Dad & I are as bound by the rules as he is. 3) The most strictly enforced rule is #1 about violence. And it has worked quite a bit in preventing the older child from sacking the younger one.
Interesting enough, the first rules broken were by Dad who received several gleeful warnings from the boy. The rules have also forced us, as parents, to be more mindful of our behaviors, knowing that we are as accountable as the kids.
So here they are: Our Family Rules
1. We believe in a safe home. No violence or threat of violence. No name calling. Wrestling is permitted only if all partners agree beforehand.
- If this rule is broken, there will be a loss of all video with the length of the loss to be determined.
2.We try to keep our house tidy. We clean up after ourselves and put our dishes in the sink.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—you clear the table for everyone
3rd time—you clear the table for everyone for 1 week
3. We help each other. When someone is asked to do something, they will do it without complaining or arguing and do it to the best of their ability.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 day
3rd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 week
4. We practice good manners. We wait until everyone is done eating before leaving the table. We may leave the table only to help another person, to get more food, go to the bathroom, etc.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—you must clear the table at everyone’s place for 1 day
2nd time—you must clear the table for everyone for 1 week
5. We love each other. We listen to each other—no interrupting or backtalk—and acknowledge when someone is talking to us.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 day
- If this rule is broken, there will be a loss of all video with the length of the loss to be determined.
2.We try to keep our house tidy. We clean up after ourselves and put our dishes in the sink.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—you clear the table for everyone
3rd time—you clear the table for everyone for 1 week
3. We help each other. When someone is asked to do something, they will do it without complaining or arguing and do it to the best of their ability.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 day
3rd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 week
4. We practice good manners. We wait until everyone is done eating before leaving the table. We may leave the table only to help another person, to get more food, go to the bathroom, etc.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—you must clear the table at everyone’s place for 1 day
2nd time—you must clear the table for everyone for 1 week
5. We love each other. We listen to each other—no interrupting or backtalk—and acknowledge when someone is talking to us.
- If this rule is broken, 1st time—there is a warning
2nd time—an additional home task will be assigned to you for 1 day
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